mr_bad_example (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
mr_bad_example) wrote2007-03-24 12:24 pm
mr_bad_example) wrote2007-03-24 12:24 pm
Dear Fangoria: I never thought this would happen to me...
I always try to learn something new every day. Last night I learned that if you show up in Urgent Care sweating like a maniac and holding a handful of paper towels up to your wrist, you get admitted in a hurry.
I wasn't even doing anything cool when I cut myself, like juggling axes or running illegal monkey knife fights. I was just washing dishes. I dropped a bowl (one of my favorite bowls--one of the ones with the little handle on the side), and I grabbed for it just a half-second too late. Opened up a nice gash on the side of my right wrist. I also learned that plunging a hand that's furiously bleeding into a sink full of water makes your kitchen look like Tobe Hooper's been over to visit.
Evidently my Boy Scout training is even more deeply ingrained than I ever suspected, because I didn't miss a damn SECOND in getting pressure on the wound and elevating it. Then I spent a few seconds debating whether I wanted to drive to the emergency room or just walk the block and a half to Urgent Care. I decided to walk, because it was early enough in the evening that if I fainted in the parking lot, somebody would find me. Besides, I hadn't really had the chance to enjoy the weather. So I left, started down the stairs, went back up the stairs and inside to make sure the sink wasn't still running, back down the stairs, and over to the clinic.
Forty-five minutes later, I was stitched up (I get a little woozy when somebody's sewin' up on me, but five minutes later, I'm right as rain. I'm physiologically entertaining that way) and on my way. On my way home--damn! I remembered I still had laundry in the machines. So I hauled that upstairs. Then I learned my third lesson of the evening: When you live alone, you have to clean the blood off the walls yourself.
I wasn't even doing anything cool when I cut myself, like juggling axes or running illegal monkey knife fights. I was just washing dishes. I dropped a bowl (one of my favorite bowls--one of the ones with the little handle on the side), and I grabbed for it just a half-second too late. Opened up a nice gash on the side of my right wrist. I also learned that plunging a hand that's furiously bleeding into a sink full of water makes your kitchen look like Tobe Hooper's been over to visit.
Evidently my Boy Scout training is even more deeply ingrained than I ever suspected, because I didn't miss a damn SECOND in getting pressure on the wound and elevating it. Then I spent a few seconds debating whether I wanted to drive to the emergency room or just walk the block and a half to Urgent Care. I decided to walk, because it was early enough in the evening that if I fainted in the parking lot, somebody would find me. Besides, I hadn't really had the chance to enjoy the weather. So I left, started down the stairs, went back up the stairs and inside to make sure the sink wasn't still running, back down the stairs, and over to the clinic.
Forty-five minutes later, I was stitched up (I get a little woozy when somebody's sewin' up on me, but five minutes later, I'm right as rain. I'm physiologically entertaining that way) and on my way. On my way home--damn! I remembered I still had laundry in the machines. So I hauled that upstairs. Then I learned my third lesson of the evening: When you live alone, you have to clean the blood off the walls yourself.
no subject
Best line all week.
PICTURES PLZ.
I'm glad you're okay.
no subject
Stupid dirty dishes. And Nadine wonders why I fear them.
no subject
"I hear a little club soda will get that out!"
Just don't be overheard at work talking about getting blood off the wall. Unless you REALLY don't like your co-workers. ;)
no subject